Round and round...

I am stuck in this infinite loop. Get up with the babe before Travis wakes up...pee, (with babe on my lap 99% of the time) coffee, email, Facebook, Twitter, blogs... keep baby from peril...Travis gets up... keep him from messing with baby, keep baby from peril...nurse, breakfast, feed us all, change baby's diaper, nurse, email, Facebook, Twitter,blogs.... dress kids... keep Travis from messing with baby, keep baby from peril...shower (or not), snack,nurse, email, Facebook, Twitter, blogs... keep Travis from messing with baby, keep baby from peril...lunch, leave house, (or not), tv, games, snack, lunch....nurse, hope for nap!!!!, email, Facebook, Twitter, blogs.... finally unload dishwasher....blabla....

It's crazy... I get NO time to myself to do anything I want to do.... yeah, ok.... so I probably have an internet addiction...it's definitely escapism....my connection to the "outside world." But people... I cannot even PEE by myself!!!

I was Hoodwinked, Hornswaggled, Harangued. Kids are great... but they are also INSANE.... and they only seem to get more so with the passage of time. Your life? No longer your own. You look and suddenly crazy amounts of time have passed since you were able to do things you used to enjoy... like knit, see a movie, or be intimate with your own husband, or were even able to finish a thought.

All I know is that it absoutely HAS to get better.... please just lie to me... just tell me it does.

Cause seriously? Two kids is my maximum load... the most I can handle. I doubt my own sanity and competent-ness (wtf... is that even a WORD?!)

I wouldn't trade large parts of it for the world. The soft breathing,the sweet-smelling, the gurgles, coos, affectionate hugs, the open-mouthed baby kisses, the giggles, the belly-laughs...touseled hair, the ability to make the world right with a nursing session, or a hug and kiss - a cookie... the joyful sound of play, the interaction, recognition, the knowlege-aquiring .... the imagination, the word "Mama", hearing "I love you mommy", the singing - the wrong lyrics, and out of key......all these things and so many more.... they make the routine, the drugery, the day-to-day grind is so very, very worth it.



I just need to remind myself of this from time to time....

Washable? Ha!

Gah!!!! While I was unloading the dishwasher a few minutes ago, Travis came out. I cleaned up his room this morning, and he had been playing happily with his train set - or so I thought.

He came out, and his arms, face, and legs were teal. He happily exclaimed he drew with the marker! My heart sank, as I dried my hands, and followed him down the hallway. There was marker all over the TV in my room! Oh, and my bedroom door! How effing exciting!!!

So, I did what any bad mommy would do... I lost my shit... I yelled at him to find the goddamned marker. He swore he didn't know where it was. I turned the tv to the "blue screen" and told him no more tv until he found the marker.

I was able to wipe the tv off, no problem - with a baby wipe. The door? Motherfucker. I cannot get it cleaned off. Not with babywipes, or rubbing alcohol... or even spray-on sunblock (a remedy I found online). So, I am going to get a Mr. Clean Eraser and hope for the best.

Of course, this happens just a few days before we give our notice, too. Loooovely!!

Dear Crayola:

I bought your so-called "Washable" Markers for this very reason. Kids draw on things. Things that are NOT. PAPER. I tried your stain-removal remedies, and then some.

Teal AKA Azul Verdoso AKA Bleu Sarcelle is still on my damn door.

I have just one thing to say....

Fuck You! Andate a la mierda! Vas te Faire Foutre!

XOXO

~TJsMommy

Move along, Nothing to see here...

1 tantruming, screaming, freaking out 3 1/2 year old not wanting his teeth brushed plus 1 open bathroom window = 3 cops knocking on our front door at 11:00pm. Scared the crap outta me, I will tell you! Jeff and Travis were reading bedtime stories in T's room when they got here. After a brief look around, they were sufficiently satisfied that we were not, in fact killing our offspring, and went on their merry way.

I could hear them chuckling as they left.

Jeezus.

Eh, okay...

Saturday, for some inexplicable reason, Travis barfed in the parking lot of trader Joes. I thought it was because I kinda tossed him over my shoulder - compressing his tummy while getting him in the cart. Everything was okay, until some hours later, when we met the in-laws in San Jose for dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. Travis kept saying he had a tummy ache and didn't feel very good. Jeff rushed him outside a few times, just in case he puked again... nothing. Then took him into the bathroom the following time... because we were kinda convinced it was some sort of ploy to go outside, when daddy really just wanted to drink his margarita in peace.

Still, he wasn't acting himself... and he told me again he didn't feel well. I admit, I didn't jump up, cause well... it's sort of impossible for me to jump up right now.... and I was thinking this was just his way of being a pain while we waited for dinner. No such luck.

Thankfully, we had a folded-up sweatshirt with us... and I was able to catch the offending fluids - coupled with the fact that the Cheesecake Factory has really tall booths... anyway, the people around us were oblivious to the fact that my kid was puking. Ugh.

So.... we finished with dinner, and said goodbye to the il's... we went to the Apple Store so I could get a desperately-needed new case for my poor scratched up iPod... and drove the hour home.

Everything was quiet from the backseat... he fell asleep... but 5 or so miles from home, the poor kid puked again all over himself - and his carseat, while he was sleeping. We pulled over, cleaned him up as best we could, and went home.

After getting home, Jeff pulled out his carseat... which really needed to be cleaned... and the poor boy dry heaved all night.

Sunday, we had quite a few watery-barfing moments, but for the most part he was okay... Monday morning, he didn't listen to me.... and drank water too fast, causing it to come back up all over my couch, carpets, twice.

I think he's totally better now... no puking yesterday... despite eating fairly normally...

I - on the other hand have had stomach cramps since last night, and frequent visits to the bathroom to do something other than peeing throughout the night and this morning. No barfing, so crossing fingers! Hopefully, it's just a coincidence... cause damn.... we JUST went through all this crap a few weeks ago (no pun intended!)

30 weeks....

WTF? Where HAS the time gone this go-round?

I swear, it wasn't that long ago that I saw those pink lines on the HPT.... and now we're down to T-Minus 7-ish weeks?

How the hell did that happen?! Um, time flies when you're chasing around a very crazy 3-year-old, that's my guess.

I had an OB appointment yesterday... uneventful, mostly. I'm trying to ignore the fact that I gained 3 pounds in 3 weeks. Ugh. My BP was 124/78... and that includes what my OB jokingly referred to as "being under duress..." due to the fact that Travis was NOT cooperating in order to leave the house for my appointment. Now begins the once every 2 week visits... cause we're getting closer.

Anyway... I finally hung up Ashley's clothes in the closet. Well, Travis' closet, actually... but we mostly store boxes in there, anyway. We're set for 0-3 month stuff.... for sure. Thanks in large part to the 75% off sale that Old Navy had a few weeks back. MIL and I scored some freaking awesome deals!

The 3-6 month stuff is filling out, and we have some things that are 6-12 already. I bought a really cute outfit for next Christmas (6-12 month size) at Gymboree yesterday. Marked down from $38.00 to $4.99. Really - I had to get it.

Anyway... It does look like a pink atom bomb detonated in that half of the closet... and - seriously? If this kid comes out with a penis... I am going to flip the eff right out. ;)

Wrapping up the week

This week has been fairly un-eventful. But, that's okay... I'm not complaining! :)

I had my OB appointment on Tuesday. Everything looks good. My blood sugar was 130, and they want you at that or below. I blame all those Peppermint Mochas during the holidays! LOL! He said as long as it wasn't higher than 130, not to worry. My BP was 120/70, so perfectly fine, and growth was good.

I am getting very uncomfortable. Lots of pelvic and lower back discomfort. This little girl is very, very low... and boy am I feeling it right about now. Ugh. My lower right hip/back is killing me right now... but I can't get into the chiro until next week. So, I just know the drive up to the in-laws tomorrow morning is going to be super-fun on my already thrashed body. Oh well, such is life.

I took a bunch of Travis' old baby clothes to the 2 consignment stores in town. The one I went to today is very chi-chi.... they only take higher-end stuff. Like, Gap, Gymboree and above. (Way, WAY above... there was some stuff in there that was ridiculous. $300. For infant clothing. Ugh.) So, I only took in some of the very nicest things I had in the 0-6 month sizes... they pay out about 35% of the selling price.... which is okay.

The coolest thing about this boutique, is that they buy everything up front, and send you a check. So, that will be nice. Honestly, I don't even want store credit in this place, it's that $$.

The other place, is much more relaxed. They are not snobby about brands, and everything is very reasonably priced. So, that's the place I will do the store credit for. They do 60% store credit, or 40% cash payout. I bought a big stack of things for Ashley there - Gymboree, Baby Gap, Carters, Osh Kosh, all of it... some of it was 2 piece sets, too! I got like 12 items of really nice stuff - for $23.00 total. So, wow - like $3.00 or under an item! Can't beat those prices!! :)

Anyway... going to try and bribe the kid to take a nap with me... cause I am really, really tired. He's been fighting them hard this week... I really hope it's just a phase... cause I will seriously fuh-reak out if he decides not to nap anymore!

Dude, only 3 months to go, until I am seriously outnumbered! How nuts is that?!

Choose Wisely....

Most days, I'm all about offering choices to Travis whenever possible. Choices empower kids, and it's good for them. Part of it, I suppose, is also selfish. Especially on non-essential matters, choices make MY life easier, most of the time. I will admit, that often times... the "choices" offered are both things that I want... for example...

"Okay, you can either put your shoes on first, or your jacket."

"You can eat your yogurt first, or have cereal."

Or, things they are things that get the job done, regardless of the "choice." And MOST times, they diffuse potential conflicts before they can start.

"You can get into your carseat yourself, or Mommy can put you in."

"You can hold my hand in the parking lot, or mommy will carry you."

I let him choose between two pairs of shoes and I let him choose between two different shirts when I get him dressed. I've been known to give him a choice between two different designs on his diapers. He chooses between Mickey and Little Einsteins on Tivo. Sometimes, he decides on Blues Clues instead.

There are times, though.... when Travis comes up with his own choice. One that was clearly not offered. Bargaining.... like he'll ask for the shirt that's in the dirty laundry pile after I've already given him the option between two clean ones. Or, worse, still... the shirt he outgrew however many months ago... 'cause his memory? It's like STEEL!

I asked him today, "Would you like waffles and eggs for breakfast this morning or Yogurt"? He counters that he wants Brownie Bites from Starbucks. At 8:30 in the morning. Um, nope. Nice try, bucko.

The real problem is that he's incessant! He'll repeat his request.... scratch that - his DEMAND no less than 850 times.

"Want brownie bites!!! Waaaant brownie bites!!!! Go byebye! Get brownie bites!"

And NOTHING will sway him. He goes on, and ON and OOOOONNNNN, until I nearly lose my marbles.

He finally relented on the breakfast this morning.... (waffles and eggs, by the way) but only after an HOUR of alternating (in his whiniest voice) ....

"Brownie bites? Where'd Daddy Go? Go bye bye!" in an endless, yet varyingly-worded loop.

AN HOUR!!!

Seriously.

Tell me this gets easier? Please? Feel free to lie to me.... if you think it will make me feel better! :)

Tis the Season....

This last week has been a blur.... all the build-up that comes with the holiday season. Peppermint Mochas from Starbucks. As long as there are only 3 pumps of peppermint, then there's no heartburn! Woohoo! Thanksgiving times 2.... cooking, baking, cleaning, shopping, tree lighting.... frantically trying to finish up gift knitting, and the digitally scrapbooked calendar for 2008 for the family in my "free time." Sigh. Free Time? There's free time? HA! :)

Also, I am officially a NaBloPoMo failure. Buit, I'm okay with that, and you should be, too! :)


Next Saturday we find out if baby #2 is a girl or a boy. I am really excited, because the bonding when I was pregnant with Travis REALLY set in when we knew he was, indeed, a Travis.

And, also, my milk? It's completely gone. Well, except for a few drops of colostrum. So, as of Thanksgiving, we are no longer breastfeeding. I was a little sad, but also breathed a little sigh of relief. I didn't want to tandem nurse... really I didn't.

The sweet thing is, Wednesday morning when Travis woke up, he asked for Cuddles (to nurse) - normally I'd tell him no, because we've only been nursing for nap and bedtime for quite some time. But, I said okay, and enjoyed just laying there, stroking his hair, while he nursed, unbeknownst to either of us, for the very last time.

I wonder how many times we've nursed in the last 3 years, 15 days. How many sweet moments have we shared. How many times I've been able to soothe him, after a fall, a bump, when a teething tooth was really bothering him, when his tummy was upset, when he was tired, cranky, sad, or uncomfortable for some unknown reason?

My magical panacea may be gone, but the memories, and close relationship we've forged will never fade.

Party down!

I hereby decry Travis' 3rd birthday a success! Well, how could it not be, with presents and CAKE? Actually, we're doing 3 celebrations. Yesterday, his actual birthday was a Great Grandma's house. Friday night will be celebrated with my dad, by going out to dinner with MORE cake, presents, etc.... and then Saturday, we're going up to Jeff's family's for birthday #3. I'm sure presents will also be making an appearance there, too. ;)Also, I will be decorating a Blue's Clues cake. With many, many million blue star-tipped-buttercream-icing-piped stars. Entirely without wine. Unlike the Mickey Cake of last year. Because, I am, in fact, secretly a masochist.

Happy Birthday, Baby!

Happy Birthday to you, my sweet little man! I can't believe you've already been here with us for 3 years! We already could never imagine life without you! I can't wait to see you continue to grow, and learn. Travis, you continue to amaze us with your brightness and charm, each day! Your sweetness, and empathy toward others is truly remarkable, and I hope you keep that with you throughout your life.

I wish you all the continued happiness, and love that the world has yet in store for you, little man.



Love always,

Mommy

Walk like a man.....

My body is starting to figure out it's pregnant.... and achy, and generally, pissed off at me today. Woohoo!

I was really, really tired today... we didn't do much all morning.... but this afternoon, I took Travis to the Aquarium for the first time in awhile.
Oh, my God. The kid insisted I carry him almost all of the 2 blocks there and back from the parking garage, and it's UPHILL to get back to the car!! And, while we were in the Aquarium, he kept whining "Mommy carry you!!!" over and over. Ugh. To clarify... he was indicating that he wanted ME to carry HIM. Stemming from back in the day, when I used to ask, " Do you want to walk, or do you want mommy to carry you?"

He does it all the time, now. In the grocery store, Target, the other day in the parking lot of the bookstore. Argh!

I SOOO can't do this anymore.... I am almost 5 months pregnant, and he is EFFING HEAVY! Oh, and did I mention, he is turning 3 on Wednesday?! He can walk damnit!

I hung up my slings when I found out I was pregnant with this baby. And, we had to give up the stroller many, many, months and months ago because he hated it so much he would just scream, and fight, and freak the eff out every time we'd put him in it.
But, now he just whines, and cries, and refuses to walk. Yeah. Fun times.

Feeling the burn.

I just got up from a nap. Hooray! Travis is still snoozing, at least until I hit Publish. So nice, considering it's been like pulling teeth to get him to nap. And then he's just so tired, cranky, and unreasonable. And yet, he JUST WON'T go down!

I DO have a terrific case of heartburn right now, that I can do NOTHING about. Apparently, it was a supremely BAD idea to make apple pie today. And to have Honey Dijon chips with lunch. Oh, and mayo on my sandwich. Yay!

I can't take Tums because the calcium in them apparently interferes with the absorption of the beta blockers in my blood pressure meds. Lovely, no? Also, I went in on Wednesday and my bp was 140/70. My dosage has been upped to 200 mg of Labetalol 3 times a day. I was already taking 200 mg twice a day.... but the last couple of days I have felt really crappy.... nauseated, headache, while my body adjusts to the new dosage.

Also, I started prenatal yoga this week. It's 1 hour on Tuesday and Thursday. I like it, but it's kicking my ass! Oh, my arms, chest, abs too! OUCH! At least it's also an hour of QUIET twice a week while Travis is down the hall in the Kid's Zone. Yay!

So, this weekend, we have a birthday party to go to for one of the kid's from our Parents Place class. They are doing some lavish thing at Pebble Beach... cause they have $$. So, that should be nice to go have a catered lunch tomorrow. Although, I still haven't found a good gift yet, I am leaning toward a gift card for Thinker Toys. Plus, we can stop by and pick it up in the morning with our Bucks run. :)

Tonight, we're having dinner with my dad.... although I don't know where yet. Crossing fingers that Travis behaves himself..... because last week at El Torito his behavior left much to be desired for the first half of dinner. We shall see....

Maybe it's just a buggy software update....

Ever since Travis was a wee little baby.... any time he started with a brand-new behavior, we have had a running joke. "He got a new download." Like our Tivo - we're certain our child receives software updates, in the middle of the night.

Seriously, he'll wake up, and exhibit a never-before-seen behavior, shriek, or some other mind-boggling thing.... Jeff and I look at each other and one of us says "He must have gotten the new download." I think at this moment, he's running version 2.35 (cause he's 2 years, and 35 months old.) But version 2.35 is buggy. REALLY buggy.

And boy, do I ever want to run anti-virus on his narrow ass some days. Sigh.

The screaming, throwing things, hitting. It's driving us effing crazy. And time-outs only work so well, ya know?

So, today, after we go to our weekly Parents Place, I will be the one at the library checking out "How to Gently Discipline Your Spirited Toddler While Pregnant So That You Do Not Fly Off the Handle, or Spontaneously Combust, For Dummies."

Wish me luck.

Blah, blah, blah

The last couple of days have been measurably better. Because of napping.... and for that I am greatful.

Travis is still being a tad more aggressive than I would like. He's freaked out and slapped me a few times... landing himself in trouble. Time-out, scolding....he seems sorry after he does it.... and he apologizes, but, damn.

I wonder, though.... where is this behavior coming from to begin with? We don't hit, he doesn't see it anywhere. I guess it's just a phase. Hopefully, it's short-lived.

Anyway....last night we went to the grand opening party for our new Safeway here in town. Er. Well, Del Rey Oaks. Oh My Gosh. It's the coolest grocery store in existence. No, really. They spent $15 million on it, and it's truely a sight to behold. This store.... 74,000-square-feet. Hell yeah!

They have a Starbucks Cafe with seating, a sushi bar, wood-oven bakery, TONS of freshly prepared stuff, and their produce section is just awesome!! Also, there are tons of organic and gourmet foods, and it's just awesome! Woohoo!

Yeah, I'm a dork.... but so are the other zillion people who went to the grand opening last night. Now, I just can't wait until the new Trader Joes opens!! :)

We came home, and I made Chicken with Apple Gravy, Rice Pilaf, and Green Beans for dinner. It was SOOO good!

Today, I need to go to Whole Paycheck and get a few things... I am attempting a Vegan cake for my brother-in-law's birthday tomorrow. I'm using this recipe for Vegan "Buttercream" Frosting which I'm sure I will add cocoa to. Hopefully it turns out, cause I have never attempted baking anything vegan before.

Oh, and the other day, I had my OB apointment. Everything seems great! :)

I got my doppler in the mail, and have found the heartbeat on my own, so YAY! Week 14, here I come!

Le sigh.

Yesterday was hard. Damn hard. As in, I had a request (after breakfast) for a Starbucks chocolate donut and milk. So, we went to the one in nearest proximity to the park playdate we had scheduled. We NEVER go to that Bucks, cause it's Way the eff out on Highway 68.... and it's a pain to get there. But the playdate was only like a mile away, so that's where we ended up.

There were NO chocolate donuts to be found. He started tearing up in line, and pushed his lower lip out, and cried like his feelings had gotten really, really hurt. He cried, and sobbed, and said "Travis SO sad!" Poor thing.... he was eventually placated with a couple of Brownie Bites, but he kept reminding me that he was "so sad" in between bites.

After that, I took The Boy to the park, and he hated being there. He screamed, like he was being killed. At the PARK, people! Then, even though my mom had planned to visit early enough to have lunch.... she was delayed, making it closer to 2:30 than the agreed-upon time of 1:ish. So, we were starving, and Travis was cranky, and not napping.

Finally, she got here, and we did have lunch, closer to 3:00... Travis started to doze off in the car, but woke up 5 minutes after the food got to our table. So, I ordered him a quesadilla, and we all ate.

Afterwards, we hit Trader Joes, and the Cranky-fest continued. We decided to skip the Farmers Market. I was dragging ass, too.... and decided to skip my Stitch 'n Bitch. Again.

My mom came back to our place for a few, and then headed out. Travis freaked the eff out. He cried. He screamed. He wailed. He went out on the balcony and yelled "GrammaWary! GrammaWary! GrammmmmaaaaaWaaaary!" (Grandma Mary) at least 5,000,000 times.

He did NOT nap! I did not nap. It was lame, lame, lame.

Add that to the round ligament pains I had all damn day, and sheer exhaustion, frustration, and the fact that my day started at 7:30 am with all the above crap.... well, at least we got pizza last night.... cause I was SOOOO not making dinner after all that crap!

I had a mini-breakdown and cried after Jeff got here. I said I didn't remember the pains of pregnancy starting this early, and it was a hard day, and I just didn't know what to do.

He comforted me... he's good like that. :) Then he suggested that since I have a couple more months left on my gym membership... and honestly? I haven't gone. InmMonths. Really.

But, he suggested I take advantage of their daycare, and either go in the pool, or take the laptop, and surf the'r wi-fi while getting a break a few times a week. Brilliant!!!
I knew I married him for a reason!! :)

P.S. It's the Great Mofo Delurk today, peeps!! Come out of the closet and post a comment for eff's sake!!


Thanks to Leslie for the heads-up!

Rambing....

Yesterday I had my OB appointment. I got a bonus ultrasound! Everything is fine! The reason for said view into my womb was the Wold's Oldest Doppler, coupled with the fact that I am chubby. I think. Anyway.... no luck finding the heartbeat with the Star Trek-era doppler..... so they popped me into the u/s room for a peek. I finally got an abdominal one, no wand in the hay-hay in the A.M......thankyouverymuch! Woofreakinghoo!! No print-out of this one.... but heart is fine, everything appears to be on track. So much so, that I get to go in bi-weekly for a bit! YAY! These weekly trips to his office have served their purpose.... but I am ready for a bit of a break! Not to mention the $35 co-pay each visit adds up!

And, I didn't even bruise so much from the bloodwork. It's about the size of my pinky nail. Nice, really....unlike last time where I was sporting a HUGE nasty bruise for 10 days afterward.

Also, I bought a doppler online last night. I found a Hi Bebe for about $100 - and it seemed like a great deal.... considering the digital-readout ones are close to $50 monthly to rent, and even the basic ones are at least $20 a month. This will be good, cause I will own it, and be able to use it for this and any possible future kiddo.
(Or, at least let friends borrow it, whatever....)

Anyway. Need to get dressed and start my day. I was up at 4am... but went back to bed as Jeff was getting up at 5:30ish.

I also need to decide if it's worth dragging Travis to Parent's Place today.... he's been a pain in my arse about it the last few times. Melt-downs, tantrums, the whole nine yards. We may just try the drop-in classes for a bit.... he can only go to Core class for another couple of months anyway - turning 3 in November and all.

Later!

Graduation Day....

Sorry for the lack of updates.... we've been out and about, and enjoying the nice weather.

I have been doing the gym thang 2-3 times a week.... always Monday and Friday, and sometimes Thursday. The other mornings we have playgroups and other scheduled stuff. Afternoons just don't work.... But, hey, it's something, right?

Today Travis had his "graduation" at Parent's Place. We are moving to the late morning slot, and since he is 3 in November, we will have to stop going then. I don't know when they "kick us out" but hopefully we can still go to the drop-in classes a bit longer.

It's hard to believe we've been going since I was a 2.5-month-postpartum, overwhelmed, no sleep having mom with a floppy big-headed infant....



And here we now......




He's so big, and bright, and outgoing! He knows shapes, and numbers, and colors, and amazes me every day! And me? Well, I think I've finally figured out most of the day-to-day goings on.