Terrible 3s

I figured something out.... I am officially screwed. Yup, you heard me. I have no control over this little boy anymore. He's officially INSANE!

It really started up a few weeks ago.... he had a language explosion of sorts. As in, he started stringing together short sentences... and I got kind of excited. You know.... cause now he could use his new-found abilities to communicate better with us. And life, as we know it would get easier. Right? Oh wrong. Wrong. WRONG!

His first foray into the multi-sentences went something like this: "Hey! Give that back! That's not Yours! That's Travis'!" Oh, it was cute the first oh, hundred times. Now? I want him to unlearn it, post-haste.

Oh, that's not the worst of it... he's learned from, godknowswhere.... this faux high-pitched dog whistle. So, it's all "Wheeewwheew!" "HEY! Give that back!" Always with that fake-ass stupid, obnoxious, disrespectful effing "whistle" - and he does it like 50,000 times a day. I want to scream. I really, really do. He uses this tactic with us, with kids at the park, kids at the Children's Museum in town, and it freaking SUCKS! I hate, hate, haaate it. He uses it whenever we tell him something he doesn't want to hear, or when we try and discipline him, and lately that is often.

Plus, it's been raining, and look at the forecast for next week!



Joy, huh?!

In this town - there's not a whole lot to do inside-wise. We have no indoor malls, and the kid's museum failed miserably the other day, due to the above obnoxious behavior. I had to drag him LITERALLY kicking and screaming from the museum because he was pulling that crap with the other kids, and hoarding the toys, and not listening.

Also, we haven't re-newed our Aquarium membership... because

1. It's Expensive.
2. The Kid's area is being remodeled, and won't be opened until April. This is one of the sole small closed- off areas in there for toddlers and pre-schoolers.
3. I CANNOT chase him all over the entirety of the Aquarium right now... I am nearly 7 1/2 months pregnant, and achy, sore, and otherwise NOT going to do it.

I am tired. Tired of the yelling, the screaming, the tantrums. I'm tired of being unhappy. Tired.... Tired of being achy, tired of being cooped up inside. Just stick a damn fork in me, already.


Don't get me wrong. I love my son. I love him with all my heart. I just really don't LIKE him right now.

Choose Wisely....

Most days, I'm all about offering choices to Travis whenever possible. Choices empower kids, and it's good for them. Part of it, I suppose, is also selfish. Especially on non-essential matters, choices make MY life easier, most of the time. I will admit, that often times... the "choices" offered are both things that I want... for example...

"Okay, you can either put your shoes on first, or your jacket."

"You can eat your yogurt first, or have cereal."

Or, things they are things that get the job done, regardless of the "choice." And MOST times, they diffuse potential conflicts before they can start.

"You can get into your carseat yourself, or Mommy can put you in."

"You can hold my hand in the parking lot, or mommy will carry you."

I let him choose between two pairs of shoes and I let him choose between two different shirts when I get him dressed. I've been known to give him a choice between two different designs on his diapers. He chooses between Mickey and Little Einsteins on Tivo. Sometimes, he decides on Blues Clues instead.

There are times, though.... when Travis comes up with his own choice. One that was clearly not offered. Bargaining.... like he'll ask for the shirt that's in the dirty laundry pile after I've already given him the option between two clean ones. Or, worse, still... the shirt he outgrew however many months ago... 'cause his memory? It's like STEEL!

I asked him today, "Would you like waffles and eggs for breakfast this morning or Yogurt"? He counters that he wants Brownie Bites from Starbucks. At 8:30 in the morning. Um, nope. Nice try, bucko.

The real problem is that he's incessant! He'll repeat his request.... scratch that - his DEMAND no less than 850 times.

"Want brownie bites!!! Waaaant brownie bites!!!! Go byebye! Get brownie bites!"

And NOTHING will sway him. He goes on, and ON and OOOOONNNNN, until I nearly lose my marbles.

He finally relented on the breakfast this morning.... (waffles and eggs, by the way) but only after an HOUR of alternating (in his whiniest voice) ....

"Brownie bites? Where'd Daddy Go? Go bye bye!" in an endless, yet varyingly-worded loop.

AN HOUR!!!

Seriously.

Tell me this gets easier? Please? Feel free to lie to me.... if you think it will make me feel better! :)

Walk like a man.....

My body is starting to figure out it's pregnant.... and achy, and generally, pissed off at me today. Woohoo!

I was really, really tired today... we didn't do much all morning.... but this afternoon, I took Travis to the Aquarium for the first time in awhile.
Oh, my God. The kid insisted I carry him almost all of the 2 blocks there and back from the parking garage, and it's UPHILL to get back to the car!! And, while we were in the Aquarium, he kept whining "Mommy carry you!!!" over and over. Ugh. To clarify... he was indicating that he wanted ME to carry HIM. Stemming from back in the day, when I used to ask, " Do you want to walk, or do you want mommy to carry you?"

He does it all the time, now. In the grocery store, Target, the other day in the parking lot of the bookstore. Argh!

I SOOO can't do this anymore.... I am almost 5 months pregnant, and he is EFFING HEAVY! Oh, and did I mention, he is turning 3 on Wednesday?! He can walk damnit!

I hung up my slings when I found out I was pregnant with this baby. And, we had to give up the stroller many, many, months and months ago because he hated it so much he would just scream, and fight, and freak the eff out every time we'd put him in it.
But, now he just whines, and cries, and refuses to walk. Yeah. Fun times.

Long day....

I was stricken with insomnia this morning. At 3:00 am. Yeah. Lovely, no? I was on a streak, too. See what happens when you get cocky? Hormones kick your ass awake.

So, I got up, peed. Drank a glass of milk. Cause I had the heartburn, and I was STARVING. So, that helped on both fronts. I checked my blogs, I went on Ravelry. I did a tiny bit of digi-scrapping, I knit. I went back to bed around 6:30.... which was when Jeff was going to work. Travis was all cuddly and warm, and we snuggled until nearly 10:00am.

We got up, I showered, he watched a bit of TV. The damn Doodlebops were on Playhouse Disney, they kept him busy so I could shower, and take care of some serious.... eh hem, landscaping issues while I was in the shower.

All was well and good, until the effing Doodlebops were OVER and Travis was absolutely was devastated that he couldn't re-watch it. He was watching tv in our room, which is Tivo-less. Plus, I HATE that freaking show! So, we don't Tivo it, anyway. The child threw the biggest effing tantrum because of some stupid-ass gay clowns.

Yeah. Then he wanted to go to Starbucks, but not get dressed to actually LEAVE the house.

So, he eats breakfast, at nearly 11:30, and then we FINALLY leave the house about an hour later. We hit Starbucks. He wants a cookie. Okay. Here ya go. Gaudy leaf decorated with bright-ass-fake-colored icing cookie. He loves it. We go to leave, and he wants me to carry his ass across the parking lot to the bookstore. I am talking ACROSS the parking lot. THE ENTIRE THING! I was like. No, you are pushing 45 pounds, and I am 4 1/2 months pregnant. We are driving to the bookstore! Freakout #2 ensues.

Then we go to the bookstore. He's fine throughout, because I read him several hundred stories. He craps his pants, and flips out because I have to change him on the changing table in the bathroom. I talk him down from that meltdown.... we go back to reading. Everything is fine. Until....I take a kid's book with us around the corner to the knitting section, then he loses his marbles. He screams, yells, kicks, because I won't let him go back to the kid section unsupervised. We leave. Immediately. He freaks out because he wanted the book. Guess which one it was? The effing Doodlebops.

Shit.

I cannot win,I tell you.

Maybe it's just a buggy software update....

Ever since Travis was a wee little baby.... any time he started with a brand-new behavior, we have had a running joke. "He got a new download." Like our Tivo - we're certain our child receives software updates, in the middle of the night.

Seriously, he'll wake up, and exhibit a never-before-seen behavior, shriek, or some other mind-boggling thing.... Jeff and I look at each other and one of us says "He must have gotten the new download." I think at this moment, he's running version 2.35 (cause he's 2 years, and 35 months old.) But version 2.35 is buggy. REALLY buggy.

And boy, do I ever want to run anti-virus on his narrow ass some days. Sigh.

The screaming, throwing things, hitting. It's driving us effing crazy. And time-outs only work so well, ya know?

So, today, after we go to our weekly Parents Place, I will be the one at the library checking out "How to Gently Discipline Your Spirited Toddler While Pregnant So That You Do Not Fly Off the Handle, or Spontaneously Combust, For Dummies."

Wish me luck.

Blah, blah, blah

The last couple of days have been measurably better. Because of napping.... and for that I am greatful.

Travis is still being a tad more aggressive than I would like. He's freaked out and slapped me a few times... landing himself in trouble. Time-out, scolding....he seems sorry after he does it.... and he apologizes, but, damn.

I wonder, though.... where is this behavior coming from to begin with? We don't hit, he doesn't see it anywhere. I guess it's just a phase. Hopefully, it's short-lived.

Anyway....last night we went to the grand opening party for our new Safeway here in town. Er. Well, Del Rey Oaks. Oh My Gosh. It's the coolest grocery store in existence. No, really. They spent $15 million on it, and it's truely a sight to behold. This store.... 74,000-square-feet. Hell yeah!

They have a Starbucks Cafe with seating, a sushi bar, wood-oven bakery, TONS of freshly prepared stuff, and their produce section is just awesome!! Also, there are tons of organic and gourmet foods, and it's just awesome! Woohoo!

Yeah, I'm a dork.... but so are the other zillion people who went to the grand opening last night. Now, I just can't wait until the new Trader Joes opens!! :)

We came home, and I made Chicken with Apple Gravy, Rice Pilaf, and Green Beans for dinner. It was SOOO good!

Today, I need to go to Whole Paycheck and get a few things... I am attempting a Vegan cake for my brother-in-law's birthday tomorrow. I'm using this recipe for Vegan "Buttercream" Frosting which I'm sure I will add cocoa to. Hopefully it turns out, cause I have never attempted baking anything vegan before.

Oh, and the other day, I had my OB apointment. Everything seems great! :)

I got my doppler in the mail, and have found the heartbeat on my own, so YAY! Week 14, here I come!

Le sigh.

Yesterday was hard. Damn hard. As in, I had a request (after breakfast) for a Starbucks chocolate donut and milk. So, we went to the one in nearest proximity to the park playdate we had scheduled. We NEVER go to that Bucks, cause it's Way the eff out on Highway 68.... and it's a pain to get there. But the playdate was only like a mile away, so that's where we ended up.

There were NO chocolate donuts to be found. He started tearing up in line, and pushed his lower lip out, and cried like his feelings had gotten really, really hurt. He cried, and sobbed, and said "Travis SO sad!" Poor thing.... he was eventually placated with a couple of Brownie Bites, but he kept reminding me that he was "so sad" in between bites.

After that, I took The Boy to the park, and he hated being there. He screamed, like he was being killed. At the PARK, people! Then, even though my mom had planned to visit early enough to have lunch.... she was delayed, making it closer to 2:30 than the agreed-upon time of 1:ish. So, we were starving, and Travis was cranky, and not napping.

Finally, she got here, and we did have lunch, closer to 3:00... Travis started to doze off in the car, but woke up 5 minutes after the food got to our table. So, I ordered him a quesadilla, and we all ate.

Afterwards, we hit Trader Joes, and the Cranky-fest continued. We decided to skip the Farmers Market. I was dragging ass, too.... and decided to skip my Stitch 'n Bitch. Again.

My mom came back to our place for a few, and then headed out. Travis freaked the eff out. He cried. He screamed. He wailed. He went out on the balcony and yelled "GrammaWary! GrammaWary! GrammmmmaaaaaWaaaary!" (Grandma Mary) at least 5,000,000 times.

He did NOT nap! I did not nap. It was lame, lame, lame.

Add that to the round ligament pains I had all damn day, and sheer exhaustion, frustration, and the fact that my day started at 7:30 am with all the above crap.... well, at least we got pizza last night.... cause I was SOOOO not making dinner after all that crap!

I had a mini-breakdown and cried after Jeff got here. I said I didn't remember the pains of pregnancy starting this early, and it was a hard day, and I just didn't know what to do.

He comforted me... he's good like that. :) Then he suggested that since I have a couple more months left on my gym membership... and honestly? I haven't gone. InmMonths. Really.

But, he suggested I take advantage of their daycare, and either go in the pool, or take the laptop, and surf the'r wi-fi while getting a break a few times a week. Brilliant!!!
I knew I married him for a reason!! :)

P.S. It's the Great Mofo Delurk today, peeps!! Come out of the closet and post a comment for eff's sake!!


Thanks to Leslie for the heads-up!

Story of my life!

I love this site!!


Love, love, love it!!

P.S.
"Those people?" They can piss off! :p

Found in Translation

Must get out of this once a week blogging rut. Ugh.

So, sore throat is about 99.8% gone. YAY! And, I have been to the gym 3 times since last week. Monday, Thursday, and this Monday. Going this morning, too. Travis seems to like it fine.... he fights me getting ready, but then, he's VERY 2 at the moment... and fights with gravity. Sigh.

In the last couple of weeks he's pottied a couple of times in the potty. Not to be repeated.... another sigh. And, he was doing well, sleeping in his bed a couple nights a week. But, alas... since Saturday. Nada. Again...Sigh.

Also, he's taken to saying "OOOH, SHIT!" So, yeah. You know that Parent of the Year Award... not happening this year. We have really tried not to swear as much in front of him, but you know.... kids latch on to EXACTLY what you don't want them to say and do. Grr.

On a happier note, Travis is becoming more vocal. He is dropping some of the "babyish" words for things. ie: "Lala" has become (usually) "water". And always identifies it by the color of the cup it resides in "Blue Water" "Guhreen Water" "Ellow Water!"

Travis thrives on routine. Each morning he wakes up and asks for "Flower 'ogurt, and Oggerries 'ogurt" (= Flower Yogurt = Trader Joes Vanilla) (Oggerries= Trader Joes Blueberry) Most afternoons he requests "Cheese Seeich, please!" For Lunch (Grilled cheese sandwich) and "Cheese an Crackers" for snack.

He calls my car "Mommy Spiderman 'ilber car" (Mommy's Spiderman Silver Car) because someone gave us a Spiderman antennae ball. He says things like "Mommy, GYM! Mommy EXERCISE! Mommy, RIGHTBACK! " Whenever we drive past the gym. When we go past the grocery store he excitedly yells out "SHOPPING!" or "YAY! TRADERJOES!"

The child can ID a Starbucks at 30 paces "'ARBUCKS! COFFEEPLACE!" 'ELLOWDONUTPLEASEM&MBARPLEASEthankyou!" (Yellow donut please, M & M bar, please, thank you!)

He runs things together like that. And whenever he wants to proclaim his pride by doing something he says "Big boy ____bysewf!" (by self).

He loves the park. He'll say "Choochoo park" or "Beach" or "Amium" (aquarium) or "BYEBYE SOON!" "BOOKSTORE!" When he wants to go out of the house.

He can do a High 5, Down Low, and "Knuckles" and if you ask him how old he is he says "Twoandhalf!"

When given a choice, like "Travis, do you want Pizza, or Mac 'n Cheese for dinner?" He goes back and forth. "Mac n Cheese or Tizza? Tizza? Mac N Cheese?" And usually ends with "YES! Tizza! Yes, Mac N Cheese!"

So, as much as my little man loves to drive me nuts by reverting into a mini-caveman.... pointing yelling, grunting, and throwing things.... he really is coming into his own.... and starting to figure out this world around him.

I am amazed each day at his perception, and intelligence, and sweetness. I love my little boy!

Averting Dinner Disasters? We'll see....

Although I love to cook.... I have a BIG problem. Well, he's 3 feet some-odd-inches tall.... and HATES it when I have to be in the kitchen with the gate closed for ANY amount of time.

Sigh. So, since Jeff often gets home late.... dinners are most-often prepared with a screaming child hanging on the gate and wailing non-stop:"Open! Open! 'ichen! (kitchen) OOOOPPPPEEEN! MOMMY HUGS!"

No amount of TV, Play-doh, or anything else will Make. IT. STOP!

Fun times, I tell you! :) So, I decided to try the new Robin Miller book out.... and shop for the specific recipes.... (although I bought my copy at Costco for $11.95)

She bugs the HELL out of me on tv.... but I watch her show anyway...

Anyway.... I used Travis' nap yesterday (and Jeff was home!) to cook up a big batch of Tangy Tomato Ragout which gets "Morphed" for a couple of different recipes
this week. I also prepped the Broccoli Puree with Parmaesan, for tonight. So, ahead of the game? We'll see.... My goal is to minimize the amount of time I have to spend in the kitchen while home alone with a very PISSED OFF toddler!

Anyway.... here's the menu for this week....

Sunday (last night)

~Grilled Chicken tenders with Tangy Tomato Ragout, and melted swiss
~Pasta with more of the sauce
~Blue Lake Greenbeans sauteed in garlic, butter, and olive oil (not really a recipe, but I like to make them this way!)


Monday (tonight)

~Pan-seared pork chops with tomato chutney (the Ragout gets reduced, additional herbs, spices, and chopped dried fruit added to make the chutney)
~Potato Broccoli Puree with Parmesan (already made, just needs re-heating)
~Salad

Tuesday:
~Shepherd's Pie with cheddar-spiked mashed potatoes
Salad

(I'll make these the night of, most likely.... I ran out of diced tomatoes yesterday, and could NOT find frozen pearl onions at the stores on Friday.)

I will chop the carrots sometime today....

Wednesday: Home-made Pizza (using Trader Joes fresh pizza dough... and assorted toppings....)
Salad

Thursday (Jeff's Birthday!)

Bolognese over fusilli (using/modifying the tomato ragout from earlier in the week.)
Salad.... and most likely go to Baskin Robbins for dessert.

So, yeah... there's the menu for the week.